It is a very rainy day: the snow and wind luxuriate. They are in consonance with my stricken heart: for since dear Peyt's death I cannot see the sunshine as before, - but every object seems a Tombstone, and on it - "Departed this life W.P.C." This is my birthday - 20th. Alas the saddest one yet: of what joy is any but a Deathday to me? There is a reproachful Voice that whispers "If the son of man should come would he find Faith in the Soul" Let me kneel and thank God that "His merciful kindness is great toward us and the peace of the Son endureth forever!" I have prayed God to sanctify my soul; and shall I fear the severe means he chooses therefore. Only Soul thou knoweth He is a God of Love. So he hath lovingly revealed himself to thee! "Holy Father, may I have the tender submission of a child to Thee: may I be enabled by Thy Spirit to lay myself at the foot of the Cross: do thou illuminate and quicken my Soul with a living Faith. Give me, O God, the Eye to see Thee in all dispensations of life, - and may Spiritual Light fall upon it. Keep me from the rebellion of Faithlessness and Ignorance: support me in the hour of trial: may I be given "Sings in the night" May another year if Thou seest fit to prolong my unworthy Life so far, bear witness to a higher growth of grace, - may I be kinder in all the relations of life; may I be in more constant communion with Thee. I ask these helpings through Christ my Redeemer.
This day wrote to Mrs. Marshall, Mrs. Stonestreet, B. Prettyman, Bro. Posey. I spent a very delightful day, reading writing talking.